Joke Pages 0153

Joke Pages

HUMOR: Get rich quick

With so many 'get rich quick' scams on UseNet,
this seemed appropriate

!!!!!!!!! GET RICH QUICK !!!!!!!!!
(well maybe not THAT quick, but..)

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THE PLAN
********
Follow the instructions in the following text.. if all goes well..
as it ALWAYS does.. you should be ROLLING in money by Christmas.

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WHAT YOU'LL NEED
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2 DOGS - Those furry four-legged animals that say Woof!
1 GRANDMOTHER - Non furry (hopefully) two-legged person.. no Woof!
1 AMOUNT OF MONEY FOR POSTAGE & HANDLING - That stuff you use to buy
stuff
1 INCREDIBLY LOW I.Q. - duh???? Forrest

**********
WHAT TO DO
**********
(1) Add the name and address of your grandmother to the bottom of the
     list at the end of this text. (If you have no grandmother.. tell
     your grandfather to wear a dress)
(2) Put your dog in a large (or small) cardboard box.. make sure to put
     lots of those little foam thingies in there so it doesn't get hurt
(3) Repeat step two for second dog.
(3) Mail ONE package to the grandmother at the top of the list at the
     bottom of this text.
(4) Mail THE OTHER package to the grandmother near the top of the list
     at the bottom of this text. (That's the second one)
(4) Call YOUR grandmother (or write a letter if the long distance
     charges are too high).
(5) Tell her that you really, really, really, REALLY want dogs for Christmas.
(6) Remove the name of the grandmother at the top of the list at the
     bottom of this text.
(7) Post this new edited list where 10 people (EXACTLY TEN.. no more..
     no less.. otherwise it won't work) will see or get a copy..
(8) Wait..
(9) Wait some more..

************
HOW IT WORKS
************
The TEN people who read "your" list will follow ALL instructions (no
joke). When they do this your grandmother will be moved to the FOURTH
spot near the bottom of the list near the end of the list at the end
of the text. These ten people will give their lists to TEN people.
THESE 100 people will follow all instructions.

When they do this your grandmother will be moved to the THIRD spot in the
middle of the list at the bottom at the bottom of the text. These 100 people will give
their lists to TEN people. When these 1,000 people get "your" list
they will follow all instructions. When they do this your grandmother
will be moved to the SECOND spot near the top of the list at the
bottom of the text. These 1,000 people will give their lists to TEN people.

Now the fun starts! These 10,000 people will follow all
instructions. When they do they will see YOUR grandmother's name in
the second spot near the top of the list at the bottom of the text and
mail one of their dogs to YOUR grandmother. Your grandmother will then
be moved to the FIRST spot at the top of the list at the bottom of the
text. These 10,000 people will give their list to TEN people

These 100,000 people will follow all instructions. When they do they will
see YOUR grandmother's name at the TOP of the list at the bottom of
the text and mail one of their dogs to YOUR grandmother. Then your
grandmother is removed from the list at the bottom of the text, never
to receive another dog again (unless, of course, one of her OTHER
grand children receive a copy of this text).

********
WHAT NOW
********
On Christmas you WILL receive 110,000 dogs from your grandmother. You
should then proceed to sell these dogs. ($69.71 - MSRP) Once you have
sold the dogs you will have $76,680. What.. you say $76680 isn't
ENOUGH?? Well then.. simply obtain 55,000 copies of THIS text. Then proceed
to follow the instructions with the dogs you have received.
Next Christmas you WILL receive 6,050,000,000 dogs.. sell them and you
will have exactly $4,217,400,000. What.. you say $4,217,400,000 isn't
ENOUGH.. then you are one greedy creep and deserve to be shot.
CAUTION: Do NOT try this method more than twice or your grandmother
MAY become upset.

****
NOTE
****
There you have it... $76,680 in less than one year, and $4,217,400,000
in less than two years. And the best part it.. IT WORKS! It's SO
SIMPLE even YOU could do it. Think about it.. the only cost is two
dogs (plus postage and handling).

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THE GRANDMOTHER LIST
********************
Thelma Macintosh
12645 Maricopa Street
Torrance, CA 90503-5146
Dellora A. Norris
11102 Gulf Shore Drivem
North Naples, FL 33969
Louise Beckett
2887a Alpha Rd.
Dallas, Texas 75344
Mary Highlight
503 Church Street
Honesdale, PA 18461
Laura Morley
125 Detroit St.
Cary, Illinois 60011

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