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Joke Pages |
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If it is all the same to you I won't be coming to work. The voices
When I got up this morning I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my
My stigma's acting up.
I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous
I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile loprosy, but I know we
I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at the Wal-Mart.
Yes, I seem to have contracted some attention-deficit disorder and,
Constipation has made me a walking time bomb.
I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn't
The psychiatrist said it was an excellent session. He even gave me
The dog ate my car keys. We're going to hitchhike to the vet.
I prefer to remain an enigma.
My mother-in-law has come back as one of the undead and we must
I can't come to work today because the EPA has determined that my
The next time you need a day off, try one of these...
told me to clean all the guns today.
Prozac. I can't get off the john, but I feel good about it.
boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. Ok?
have that deadline to meet...
hey, how about them Skins, huh? So, I won't be able to, yes, could
I help you? No, no, I'll be sticking with AT&T, but thank you for
calling.
come in to work knowing my employee records may now contain false
information.
this jaw restraint so I won't bite things when I am startled.
track her to her coffin to drive a stake through her heart and give her
eternal peace. One day should do it.
house is completely surrounded by wetlands and I have to arrange
for helicopter transportation.
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